


That’s Not How You Ask Someone Out

by clowchan



Category: Chitty Chitty Bang Bang - All Media Types, Trouble in the Heights
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Gift Fic, M/M, Nevactacus, Nevada is such a butthole, and a little sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-09
Updated: 2016-09-09
Packaged: 2018-08-14 02:22:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7995160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clowchan/pseuds/clowchan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I found this otpprompt (that I tweaked) and I thought it would be perfect for how Nevactacus met: “Imagine your OTP meets when Person A pickpockets Person B.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	That’s Not How You Ask Someone Out

**Author's Note:**

  * For [notmyyacht](https://archiveofourown.org/users/notmyyacht/gifts).



> Written for @notmyyacht as a birthday gift but it's belated cos of a power outage. Please enjoy!  
> Sorry for the awful title :”)

Nevada was stuck babysitting his nephew again. He loved his sister but why does she need to go out so much? He was a busy man and had no time to play _tío_ today. Or any other day. And of course, his nephew wanted to go to the playground. What he wanted to be surrounded by - screaming children. _Fuck_. Even if she was his _hermana_ , she owed him. It was here he noticed a strange man dressed all in green and blue plaid. _“Who let the freak out of the circus?”_ he muses to himself. He tries to ignore him but can't. He switches seats so he couldn't look at him anymore.

“Jeremy! Jemima! Please be careful!” A British accent? Here in the Heights? Who was it? And once again it was the strange man in plaid _. Goddammit_. “You're giving your poor father such a fright.”

“Sorry, Daddy!” The little girl said as she runs up to him. She too was dressed in a similar style - a green-blue plaid shirt covered by a yellow chequered dress. The man kneels down and gives her a hug.

Nevada being Nevada couldn't help but gaze at his ass and he whispers, _“Damn.”_ He had to pinch himself. A playground was not the right place to be checking out anyone. _Who the hell was this?_ He looks down at his watch. 5:30. It was time to leave, thankfully. “Hey, Dante, _tenemos que irnos._ ”

“But _Tío_!”

“Now,” he growls. If Nevada was late again, he would never hear the end of it from his sister or his business partner, who just so happened to be his brother-in-law.

“Ok,” Dante pouts, reaching for Nevada's hand.

As they leave the park, Nevada peers over his shoulder to give one last glance at the man in plaid again.

* * *

A few days later, Nevada returns to the park and once more the strange man was there. This time, he was dressed in grey and blue plaid vest and pants. And Nevada's eyes trailed down his backside and his pants hugged his ass  _perfectly_ . Was he doing this on purpose? Now he was becoming interested in him. If only he didn't have children. Was he even married? Both times he's seen the man, there was no spouse around, and there was no ring on his finger. Not like that's stopped Nevada. He's slept with married people before but he hated dealing with the baggage that came with it. 

_“TÍO NEVADA!”_ Dante's voice snapped him back to reality. “WATCH THIS!” His nephew jumps high off a swing and lands rather hard on the ground. “Ow.”

“ _Dios mío_ ,” Nevada shakes his head, rolling his eyes. All he imagined was his sister lecturing him on how to watch his nephew better or how they didn't need another family tragedy. He walks over to check on him and so does the man in plaid. _“You have got to be fucking kidding me,”_ he says to himself.

“Are you all right?” The man asks before looking at Nevada. “Sorry.”

“It's ok,” Nevada says, trying to ignore him.

“I have a first aid kit if you need me to get it.”

Nevada cocks an eyebrow. What kind of Boy Scout was this guy?

“I'm good!” Dante says brushing himself off. The man steps back and goes back to his bench.

“ _Qué alivio_ ,” Nevada says.

“I want to go higher!”

“I don't think so. Taking you home before you actually break something,” Nevada grabs him by the sleeve of his shirt.

“But I won't!”

“ _No me importa, Dante_. Your mother will kill me,” Nevada says in a stern voice. He'd rather be tortured than deal with his sister if his nephew got hurt.

“Yes, _Tío_ ,” Dante grumbled, crossing his arms.

* * *

It would be another couple weeks till he saw the man for the third time, dressed in a purple plaid outfit. Nevada wanted to strike up an actual conversation with him, but he had to make it interesting. The man had his back turn to him and Nevada made his move. He casually walked past him, slipped his hand into his back pocket, and took out his wallet. It's been a long time since Nevada pickpocketed anyone but the rush felt amazing. He sits back down, spreading his arms along the back of the bench, waiting.

It took only a moment for the man to realise what had happened. There was a look of dread that grew on his face which caused Nevada to smirk. It was when the man looked at him, he flashed his wallet.

“Hey!” The man walks over to him.

“Just take it as a lesson. Never put your wallet back there,” Nevada says, flipping through his cards and pulling out his ID. “What kind of name is Carah? Caractacus?”

“A noble one. Now if you don't mind, please give me back my wallet,” Caractacus crosses his arms, looking unamused.

Nevada shoves the ID back into the wallet and tosses it to him. “Here.”

Caractacus glares at him as he catches it, “That's not a nice way to find out someone's name. You could have asked.” He places the wallet in his front pocket. “I ought to call the cops.”

It was here when Nevada's guards moved in on to the man. Nevada waves them off and he grins, “They won't do nothing, _Inglés.”_ This was true. The cops in the Heights were bribed well enough for them to ignore nearly all crimes committed by Nevada or his crew. They certainly wouldn't be bothered with petty theft.

“Then I shall take myself and my children elsewhere and not deal with the likes of you.” Caractacus turns around in a hasty manner, causing Nevada's guards to snicker. 

There went his plans on having a conversation with him.

“Jeremy and Jemima, we have to go.”

“Daddy?” The both of them peer up at him, frowning. He grabs their hands and starts to leave.

“ _Tío!_ I was having fun with them. What did you do? I'm telling _Mami_!” Dante stomps his feet.

_Fuck._ He did promise her he wouldn't cause trouble, and he didn't think what he did was that big of a deal.  Worst of all he had to swallow his pride and apologise. _Disgusting_. He looks up at the guards, “Watch Dante for a second. Need to take care of something.”  He catches up to him, “Caractacus!”

“What do you want?  To make a fool of me again?” he says as he keeps walking, not looking at him.

“No,” Nevada purses his lips for a second. “I assumed it would be funny.”

“You do realise what they say when you assume, correct?”

“Let me make it up to you,” Nevada pulls out a couple hundred dollars and tries to hand it to him.

“I don't want your money,” Caractacus declines.

Nevada shoves the money back into his wallet. Who the fuck declines money anyway? “How about I take you out for a cup of coffee?” Nevada thought that sounded better.

“If I say yes will you leave me be?  The bus I take is going to be here any moment and I need to go home.”

“ _Lo prometo._ I mean I promise. 4PM at Starbucks?”

“I think I can make that,” Caractacus says as the bus pulls up. “Good day to you.” As he gets on the bus, Nevada could overhear his children, “Oooh, Daddy has a date!”

“Children! I do not,” he chuckles as they sit next to one another.

* * *

Nevada finds himself waiting at the back of Starbucks. He looks at his watch. 4PM. No sign of Caractacus. He wondered if he got fooled. Then again, he did piss him off pretty good. He was a little disappointed because he let such a nice ass slip away like that.  He was about to leave when Caractacus enters the store, a little breathless.

“My apologies. The children's nanny was late, but I'm here as promised!” He takes a seat across from Nevada.

Nevada couldn't help but take note of what he was wearing. It was a plainer outfit - a brown chequered plaid three-piece suit. He barely knew him, but he missed the ridiculous colours he wore before. He clears his throat and folds his hands together, “Ok, the reason I brought you here is...” He takes a breath in. How he hated what he was about to do next. “I wanted to say I'm sorry for being such an asshole yesterday.”

“Oh?”

“Also my nephew enjoys hanging out with your kids. I don't want to ruin that for him.” He also didn't want to face his sister's wrath. He would never admit that to anyone, especially to a stranger.

“My children do enjoy his friendship and their happiness means everything to me. I think all can be forgiven if they can remain friends.” Caractacus smiles.

“That sounds good.”

“Oh! I forgot to ask you, but what's your name?”

It shocked Nevada that there was someone who ventured into _his_ neighbourhood that didn't know who he was or what he was capable of. It was kind of refreshing. His curiosity about this man only grew. “Nevada Ramirez.”

Caractacus nods, “Well, Mr Ramirez. It was nice for us to meet like this.” He shakes his hand and stands back up.

“Call me Nevada. And leaving so soon?”

“I assumed you only wanted to apologise to me and that's it.”

“What was it that you told me about assuming?” Nevada smirks.

“Touché,” Caractacus smiles.

“You know, you intrigue me,” Nevada gestures for him to sit again.

Caractacus takes his suit jacket off and places it on the back of the chair before taking a seat. “How so?”

“The way you dress, how you speak,” Nevada explains. “What is that you do?”

“I'm an inventor, specialising in engineering and wheelworks. I turn household objects into more practical and some might say whimsical items.” There was an air of pride in the way Caractacus says this. “Currently, a lot of my inventions take up room in my home, but the children don't mind.”

“I bet your wife does.”

Caractacus stops smiling for a moment and looks away. “My wife... I'm actually a widower. She passed away a little over two years ago.” His body slumps a little in his chair.

“ _Oh shit._ ” Nevada didn't mean to upset him. “I didn't know.”

“Of course, why would you?” Caractacus smiles a little. “It's all right.”

On one hand, Nevada did feel bad bringing up something that made Caractacus sad. On the other, the man _was_ single and Nevada could not stop thinking about that ass and what he would do with it. He had to quickly change the subject, “Hey, want me to get you a drink?”

“I am a little parched.”

Nevada snaps his fingers a couple of times and one of his guards come up to him, “Yeah?”

Nevada looks at Caractacus, “What do you want?”

Caractacus looks over his shoulder and scans the menu. “That salted caramel one sounds good,” He starts to pull out a $5 bill. “With extra caramel, please.”

Nevada stops him, “No, my treat.”

“Are you sure? I can p-”

“I owe you,” he smiles playfully.

“If you like to,” Caractacus says, sounding unsure.

Nevada looks at his guard, “What he said and a venti caffé americano for me.”

“ _Sí, Trujillo_.”

“Thank you,” Caractacus says, blushing a little.

_Damn._ Seeing him blush was such a turn on for Nevada. Honestly, if Nevada could, he would fuck him on the table right then and there. But even he knew better. All he could do was say “ _de nada_ ” and kept his thoughts to himself.

A few minutes later, his guard returned, silently handing their drinks to them.

“Fan of really sweet shit, no?” Nevada says.

Caractacus laughs, “You could say. It's one of my few weaknesses, I'm afraid.”

Nevada couldn't believe he found himself smiling more, the longer they spoke. Was he actually falling for him? What was wrong with him? Other than to please his sister and to keep his nephew happy, his _only_ objective was to sleep with Caractacus. This was changing rapidly. He wanted to get to know him better. The men continued on with their conversation, discussing family and hobbies. Nevada was surprised to find out that the very prim and proper Caractacus enjoyed playing video games, particularly Grand Theft Auto. Naturally, he never played such games when his children were home.

They finished their drinks and leave the coffee shop.

“I have to admit, you're an interesting man, Nevada,” Caractacus says, checking his pocketwatch.

“You're not so bad yourself.”  Nevada decided to kiss Caractacus.

At first, Caractacus seemed like he was into it, but he stopped and backed away. “I - I can't.” He wipes his mouth. “I truly enjoyed your company and our conversation from today. Admittedly, I do like you _in that way,_ but I'm afraid to move on and disrespect my late wife.”

It would be a lie if Nevada didn't feel frustrated by what Caractacus told him. _“Why should that hold you back?”_ slips out of his mouth. Even Nevada knew he fucked up and he winced at his own words.

Caractacus stands there for a moment, looking stunned. A second later he grabs Nevada by his leather jacket, and to Nevada's surprise, he kisses him. “Thank you for your honesty.”

Nevada wasn't sure if this man was fucking with him or being sincere. “ _Mira,_ I didn't mean to say it that way. I meant-”

Caractacus shakes his head, “No. I needed to hear that. Even my dear Mimsie would have told me the same.” He kisses his cheek. “My bus is about to arrive, but I like very much to see you again.” He hands him a business card. “You probably think of me as old-fashioned, but I do have a mobile phone. Here's my number. Relay me a message of when you would like to meet again. I look forward to it.” Before stepping onto the bus, Caractacus kisses him quickly and waves goodbye.

In a rare moment, Nevada was speechless. He looks at the card and texts him: _“My place, Friday, 6 pm.”_

He receives a text back: _“That sounds good :) Your address?”_

Nevada couldn't believe he forgot to tell him. He sends directions to his place right away. For the first time in Nevada’s life, he looked forward to an actual date with someone.

**Author's Note:**

> Translations:   
> tío – uncle  
> hermana - sister  
> tenemos que irnos – we have to go  
> Dios mío - oh my God  
> qué alivio - what a relief  
> no me importa - I don't care  
> Inglés – English  
> mira - look


End file.
